Sunday, March 3, 2013

"Parent"dox: The Later They're Up, The Earlier They're Up

par·a·dox \ˈper-ə-ˌdäks, ˈpa-rə-\
          a statement that is seemingly contradictory or opposed to common 
          sense and yet is perhaps true
1.  It is a paradox that computers need maintenance so often, since they are meant to save people time.  (
par·ent·dox  \I need one of my genius speech path friends to do 
                            this part\                                 
                            \Kelli & Gretchen are laughing right now\
the daily experience that is parenthood; seemingly living life in contradiction
          1.  It is a "parent"dox that I am exhausted pretty much all day, but the second my head hits 
          the pillow, my mind starts remembering all of the random things I need to do and I am 
          instantly wide awake.  (   

Sunday Night "Parent"dox #3: The Later They're Up, The Earlier They're Up

I love my children dearly.  

I love their sweet little faces.  I love their bouts of laughter.  I love their hugs and kisses.  

But sometimes I just need a break from all that wonderfulness.  And I need them to sleep.

Once we had established somewhat of a sleep schedule with my first-born, (which took a little while, if I'm being entirely honest...) complete with a regular bed time, I figured I would be given the precious gift of a set amount of hours of sleep by said child.  

One would stand to reason that if a kiddo went to bed later than his regularly scheduled bedtime, that he would simply tack those hours on to his ridiculously early regularly scheduled wake up time in the morning.  This is how it worked out in my own sleeping life.  Later to bed, later to rise...isn't that how Benjamin Franklin put it? If I paid the price and put in some extra "mom hours" at night, then I could regain some "just for me" hours in the morning, in the form of sleep.  Seems like a natural law of physics or something, right?

Oh, how incredibly wrong I was...

This is how I learned of another of life's "parent"doxes:  The later they're up, the earlier they're up.

Whenever my children go to bed later than anticipated, they actually wake up earlier than usual the next morning.  As if to silently remind me, "Mom, I'm the one calling the shots here.  Just remember that..."

I have no idea why this happens.  I'm sure there are a million sleep experts who could explain it with Circadian rhythms or establishing positive sleeping habits or phases or the moon or something.  

For me, all I know is that when my kids are up extra late, I better plan on an extra early wake up call the next morning.  And an extra Coke.  Or three. 

No matter what time they go to bed; no matter what time they get up...You're a Good Mom.

Oh, how I wish I had some way to share some sort of video or audio recording of me writing this last post.  Yes, it is shorter than most.  "Is she running out of things to say?" you may wonder.  Those of you who know me well know this is never a legitimate possibility, sorry to say.  

I have been sitting at the kitchen counter.  My kids have been sharing -- yes, sharing -- the other bar stool next to me while playing Legos.  (Note: I sat down with my lap top by myself in the kitchen to write a quick little post.  These acquired "writing partners" were not part of the original plan.)  By playing, I mean crashing, tumbling, crying, screaming, dropping and any other loud or chaos-related verbs you can think of here.  I just have to smile.  I wouldn't have it any other way.  

Apologies for any and all typos, misspellings and overall lack of complete thought above.  Thanks for reading anyway!


  1. Gospel. I love when people (usually those without kids) give us a hard time about having to get home so we can put our kid to bed at a decent hour, saying "Just let him stay up, he'll sleep in tomorrow", and I kind of want to ask them if it's ok if we give them a ringy-dingy when he wakes up so we can chat. My son is not an early riser, no matter what time he went to bed... I can probably count on one hand the number of times he has woken up before 7:00. He normally sleeps until about 8:00 or later. But he ALWAYS wakes up at that time, whether he went to bed at 7:30pm or 1am. Which, ok, I can handle an 8am wake up. But when he's only had 6 hours of sleep, oyyyyyyyyyyy...........

    1. It's like they have some sort of internal clock that never shuts off or something. I am liking your idea about the phone call to other parties in question in the morning...hmmm, you may be on to something there... Thanks for sharing your comment! Wishing you lots of glorious sleep tonight before your little guy wakes up at 8:00am tomorrow!


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